All of my students know that I am leaving during summer vacation, and that next semester there will be a new English teacher.  And although theorhetically, they have all been told I’m not leaving until the end of August, NOT all of them really grasped that part.

This week I am in the middle of a 10-day English day camp for 4th and 5th graders.  There are all sorts of programs going on at school, so kids are in and out all day long.  If you are a Korean student, there really is no such thing as summer vacation.  One of my students told me that he wasn’t looking forward to it because even though he wouldn’t have to go to school, his mother would make him attend 학원 all day long now.

Anyway, one little girl in 1st grade saw me at school the other day.  And she screamed across the room:

“아직 안 갔지!?”
You haven’t left yet?

Adept readers will notice that that sentene is about as deep in 반말 as it could be. Most of the time, my students speak with apporiate politeness when they use Korean. If they use 반말 it is never to be intentionally disrespectful, but instead because of 4 reasons. 1) They are just joking, 2) They don’t really see me as a “선생님” (probably because I am just the silly English Teacher) and they are trying to build a more friendly relationship. 3) They are still learning how to use Korean correctly.  4) They think they can get away with it.

Anyway, I usually don’t let them get away with it. And since what she said was about as rude as it could be, I was NOT going to let this little girl slide. So after she screamed “아직 안 갔지” she ran over towards me to presumably hug me or continue this conversation. She hit a brick wall:

Austin: “너 이리 와…다시 말해봐” (Get over here…try to say that again)
(that is my standard phrase to make a kid use 존댓말.  The nuance is that the kid said something wrong and should fix it.)

Bratty girl: “니가 안 갔어?” (You didn’t go?)
Austin: “뭐래? 다시 말 해봐..디시!” (What did you say? Say it again…again!)
Bratty girl: “언제 가?” (When are you going?)
Austin: “그 건 뭐야? 어? 안 갔어 뭐야? 아직 안 갔지 뭐야? 내가 선생님이라서 니가 그렇게 말했냐?” (What is that? Huh? You didn’t go? You haven’t left yet? I am a teacher, and you speak to me like that?!”
Bratty girl just looks at me with this really confused and bewildered expression.
Austin: “다시 말 해봐…이렇게…선생님 언제 가세요?” (Try again, like this: Teacher, when are you leaving?)
Bratty girl (in a very small, timid voice): “선..생..님…언제…가…세…요…?
Austin: “오! 언제 가냐고? 8월 21일에 갈 거야! 그래 아직 안 갔어” (Oh! When am I leaving? I’m leaving August 21. You’re right I haven’t left yet.)

It is difficult to express the difference between sentences like:

아직 안 갔지? and 언제 가

with

아직 안 가셨어요? and 언제 가세요?

While there are (dis)repsectful ways of seaking in English, it does not map to the speech levels in Korean. Suffuce it to say that his girl was being really “impolite.” I use quotes because I’m about 80% sure this particular student has some sort of learning disability which might offer some explanation as to why I had such difficulty getting her to correct her mistake. Still, I think there is little excuse for it and if she is having similar problems when adressing older Koreans, she MUST learn to speak properly.

Now, I want to go back to the fouth reason I suspect kids might use 반말 with me; they think they can get away with it. This comes courtesy of 현우. I was talking with him a week or so ago, and shared some stories of students using 반말 towards me. His theory is that kids see it as an “escape” from the very rigid rules of their linguistic culture. 99% of students wouldn’t even DREAM of speaking to their Korean teacher like that. The concept doesn’t even register. But because I am a foreigner, I fall outside of the rigid social mores. Surely the consequences for using 반말 or trying to give me a 똥침 are going to be much less severe than the extremely unlikely scenario of either of those happening to a Korean teacher.

Now, I can see perhaps two ways to react. First, I sort of like the idea of allowing kids some chance to get a “release” from the “stress” and “constraints” of their culture. It’s part of the reason I try very hard to make my English classes purely enjoyable and am happy even if they didn’t learn a whole lot, so long as they enjoyed the process.

However, I believe in reinforcing the rules and expectation that Korean culture places on them. They should not get in the habit of using 반말 with adults.  I don’t want to guilty of contributing to their confusion.

What would you do?